I want to share a quote I provided on the Love Isn't Enough website's Open Thread this week. In response to some resistance regarding the name change from Anti-Racist Parent to Love Isn't Enough, I quoted Kenaz Filan author of Vodou Love Magic (I'm commenter 28):
“Some would have you believe that if you love your partner (or child) long enough and fiercely enough, that person will be healed of old emotional wounds that reach the potential that you saw all along….Nobody claims that love alone is enough to cure cancer. No one writes romance novels about people who were once diabetic, but we can now snack on candy bars thanks to their partner’s undying devotion. And yet we have this odd idea that we can cure alcoholism, mental illness, or other psychological behaviors by love alone. What’s worse, we often blame ourselves when our unrealistic expectations aren’t met! (”If only I were a better partner (or parent), maybe he wouldn’t behave like that.”)…Your love for each other can certainly help, but only if it is combined with deeds and actions, not just words and promises.”
() were my additions.