Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Bianca’s List of Best Sex Toys & Books for 2009

I did this last year (there’s no link because my computer crashed and I lost all those old posts) and provided some of the top toys of various texture, material, and price and I’m here to do it again! These toys I’ve actually USED and have reviewed 98% of them and the reviews are posted with links. Now, many of these are NSFW along with the links they go to so please keep that in mind.

I’ve selected toys that are not only ranging from the very affordable ($1) to the splurge worthy ($80), but also toys that can be useful for people with disabilities, latex allergies, and all sorts of interests and sexual orientations. Let’s begin with the least expensive toy to the most expensive and I’ve also linked to some books that maybe of interest (and great gifts) as well.

Elbow Grease Lube $1.

My last long-term partner was very well endowed, and I’ve admitted that I’m a size queen. When he hinted that he wanted to have some anal play I called up my homeboy R and asked him what was a good lube for “big dick butt sex” as I called it then. He suggested Elbow Grease and I’ve never looked back! I tried a small sample like this one for just $1 and then purchased larger containers as I saw fit. The lube lasts long (which is GREAT) and comes in numerous variations including a silicone one. Try these out for $1 and see which one, if any, works for you!

Bondage Tape $6.50

Sometimes getting into some role-play or experiencing pleasure in various ways, which for some people includes experiencing pain and/or being humiliated, the items used can be intimidating. One of the ways I’ve realized I can introduce such play to my partners are through this bondage tape. This tape works well without having to pull your pelitos off (unless that’s your fancy), but it’s also not very intimidating. My experience has been that introducing someone to something new with an item they come into contact with on a regular basis means they are sometimes a little more open to experiencing more. I’ve found that with this tape. The tape also comes in various colors (red, purple, pink, white, and black).

Suction Cup Plug $7

Suction cup anything usually makes my day. You see it’s not often you find a good toy that has a suction cup that can be put in numerous places for some action. That’s what you’ll get with this toy. Not only can you use this by itself (it’s kind of short with a few ridges so keep that in mid) but it’s main use is to be used with your favorite penetrative toy. The catch is that you have to have a toy that can be inserted into the suction cup. Not many toys come with this feature, so make sure before purchasing this that you check out the stash you have to make sure you can use this with the toy you have in mind. I also appreciate this toy because it can be used with/for people with some disabilities.

Prostate Pleaser $17

I can’t recall if this was on my last list or not, but if it wasn’t boy was I wrong! Sometimes there are toys that I’ve reviewed that I gave a low score to. Then I spend some more time with the toy and I realize that I should have given myself more time with the toy. This is one of those toys. I originally wrote my review of this toy and only gave it 3 stars. Today it’s one of my “go to” toys for certain activities. I’m impressed with the flexible material that very easily moves, the poppers are great, and the material can pick up various sensations when I use other things with this one. Originally created for men, I’ll admit that I don’t use this for its intended purpose but still have a fabulous time!

Inflatable Position Master $30

I’ve always wanted a toy like this, but more dense. When I realized I had nowhere to put such a toy I was too happy when I got this toy to review. Not only does this toy work with people with various disabilities, but it also can be hidden out of site, and work for non-sexual activities, such as having your legs elevated to help relieve back pain. The toy is inflated by the user and you can also deflate whenever you like. One of the aspects of the toy I did not appreciate was the velvet fabric which does not do well with stains, which is inevitable with any form of sexual expression. It also has handle on the side for gripping of either person, yet the velvet feel does supply some level of resistance and neither partner experiences a slipping off of the item.

Climax Silicone Wavy Shaft $31

I really do adore toys that come with different parts that are removable and can be used with other toys. That is exactly what this one does. There are two parts and one is the main part that can be used for penetration. The second part is a baby bullet that can be removed. It comes with it’s own batteries and you can use it with anything else. The sound isn’t as loud as others and the toy is waterproof! You can read my full review of the toy here.

Sportsheets Under The Bed Restraints $45

I met the creator and owner at a SAR in Arizona at the AASECT conference. He said the interview he did with SexHerald, the publication I write for, was the most extensive and thoughtfully crafted he’s done with industry folks. I then gave his sheets a try. He focuses on “relationship products” to enhance the relationships people have with one another. I’m a fan of the under the bed restraints specifically, but there are several other products to choose from that do not necessarily attach to sheets. They are a bit pricey, but if this is an activity you enjoy than these will be well worth the cost. They are sturdy and machine washable. What I most enjoy is that this product has been thoughtfully designed. You can always tell what the thoughtfully crafted toys are especially by how they work when you use them.
Spare Parts Joque Harness $89

My homegirl Laura suggested I give this toy a try and review. It is the Bentley of harnesses. As many of you know: I’m not a small girl. Finding a harness that is going to fit all my juicy goodness and not result in chafing of my thighs or legs is extremely difficult. When I got the Joque Harness to review I was immediately impressed. Not only does it come in 2 different sizes (of which I received the larger), but it also comes in various different colors. It is extremely thoughtfully designed, does not have chafing when I put it on, is machine-washable, and does not need adjusting after you get it to fit you properly. The only downfall of this toy is it’s price. But the price is very much worth all of what you get in this harness. It fits various sizes of dildos has a compartment for extra toys, rides low, and is just an amazing investment!

Here are several books that if I didn't read to review I would loved to have received as gifts. I'm sure you ahve someone in your life that may be the same way and so I hope you consider looking these up and getting them!

Queer Ricans: Cultures and Sexualities In The Diaspora
($20) by Larry La Fountain-Stokes came out in 2009 to amazing reviews. Mine is forthcoming and I'll post it when it is available. This is a book that I would place in the same company of Chela Sandoval's Methodology of the Oppressed and Frantz Fanon's Black Skin, White Mask. Not only is it groundbreaking in migration and Puerto Rican studies, but it is also interdisciplinary and puts into conversation theorists and scholars with communal activists and artists.

Sweat Tea: Black Gay Men Of The South ($35) by E. Patrick Johnson is also a very revolutionary text that centers the narratives and testimonios of Black gay men living in the southern US. This is something that has rarely been done, and although there is some controversy over Johnson, who is a performance art scholar, performing some of the narratives he collects, this text is nonetheless an amazing addition to what we know of Black men who are gay and living in the south. Read my full review here.

Iridescence: Sensuous Shades of Lesbian Erotica
$15 is an edited text focusing on lesbians of Color. It is rare that I find a text that is edited and focuses on people of Color that I actually enjoy. Often erotica is pretty predictable. What I enjoy about this text is that the authors are people of Color and they express and explain their characters and all the complex aspects of their identity that are unique to people and women of Color. You can read my full review here.


  1. What do you have available for men?I'd like to give my brother a weird gift. he'd surely enjoy a extra ordinary toy. i hope to hear from you soon. More power to you and to your site! Thank you for sharing the sale!

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  2. I feel strongly learning the topic,do you have any toys for men?yours toys and price very cheap. however I need to learn more on this topic.
    Carry on your updates..!!


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