Saturday, September 27, 2014

Lesson 13: Lessons Learned as a LatiNegra Sexologist


You will not always tell folks you are a sexologist because you don't always want to work when you are out with your homies, or at a party.

Life Lesson:

Because once folks find out what you do all the questions roll in. You won't ever be able to have a "break" from your work and have some fun. You will constantly be "on" answering questions, correcting information, debunking myths, and challenging folks to push beyond binaries.

You get to chose when to do this. Sometimes it will be clear when you want to take a break versus when you want to work. You deserve a break. You deserve to not always work, for free at that! Folks at parties think this type of talk is fun, but for you it's your life's work. It's fun, sure, but sometimes you want to sit back and talk about something else!

Other times you may just sit quietly while others discuss sex/uality topics. This may be difficult if you hear misinformation. Eventually, your homies and support systems will recognize when you need a break, they will help protect and shield you from nonsense coming your way. They will understand why you may choose to be silent during such topics and conversations. Other times you'll have to remind them in case they forget. It's not personal, they are proud of you and want to brag about you to show their love and adoration for the work you do. Recognize that and hold onto it when you have the ability to.

Sometimes, being silent will work to your advantage because if you do choose to engage, folks will listen more intently. You will rock folks world when you share the knowledge you have. When you choose to of course. You will also learn a lot by listening to what others have to say. This is always important.

You decide what and how much you wish to share with folks. As a LatiNegra sharing personal experiences and realities give a different layer and complexity to your work. But it is also exhausting, revealing, and you deserve privacy and safety. 

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