Lesson 3: Lessons Learned as a LatiNegra Sexologist

Lesson:

Your unlearning and learning process will be lifelong.

Life Lesson:

Yeah, folks say this all the time in some variiation, but what they don't say is that you won't be just learning new things, but you will be unlearning a majority of the white supremacist, colonizing, oppressive, and hurtful stuff the field in the US was built upon. Being trained by only racially white people in school, clinical settings, non-profit spaces, will be parts of your training. You do not have to hold on to all they teach you. Most of it is incorrect and wrong anyway. Especially the cultural parts.

Plus, things will change anyway. Language is alive, it will change and this you will learn. You will learn about new findings, new ways the body can heal, new forms of medication and prevention. But you will also have to unlearn all the ways you were told the body usually works. Those forms of training are cissexist, heterosexist, and guesses at best! You will learn folks bodies are not the same, no matter how much folks with MDs and PhDs say they are, and young people will lead this!

The unlearning is something that has been done in secret, a form of shame and embarrassment. But having survived more shame and embarrassment than other folks wish to even understand, you will know that sharing this unlearning process is imperative. Doing this publicly will be healing for you and others. It will be a good example of what is wrong with the field. It will help others come to understand their unlearning process. It will open you up to building connections and networks with folks who holding onto those ideas would push away and keep you isolated.

It will become a part of your integrity.

Unlearning is mostly uncomfortable, but it doesn't have to be painful. It won't be if you see it as a gift, a healing, a necessity. It is also collective and you are not doing it alone no matter how often it feels that way. Sometimes unlearning is the only option.

For inquiries or to hire bi visit her site or email bianca@biancalaureano.com